Sisterhood

Jesus Christ is a being of wholeness and opposites. In the scriptures, He is called the beginning and the end, the alpha and the omega. He brought about eternal life by dying. He suffered for all sins but was perfect. He is meek and submissive toward our Heavenly Father, but he is strong and valiant in His defense of the gospel and doctrine. Humble, loving, kind, selfless, forgiving, compassionate—all of these attributes were acted out during the Savior’s life as well as during his premortal and current existence. As disciples of Christ, all of us, men and women, children and adults, we have all been asked to emulate Him and walk in His way. I have been asked to specifically focus today on the discipleship of women and the righteous influence women can wield for the strengthening of the church and those around us. 

In the Old Testament, we have the story of Ruth and Naomi. Naomi and her husband with their two sons left their home due to a famine and traveled to a different land. While living in this foreign country, Naomi’s husband died. Time passed and both of her sons married women from the foreign land. One of Naomi’s sons married a woman named Ruth. The other married a woman named Orpah. Then both of Naomi’s sons died. Now alone, Naomi decided to return to her home country. She told her daughters-in-law to stay in their country and return to their families. Orpah did so. Naomi said to Ruth, “Behold, thy sister in law is gone back unto her people, and unto her gods: return thou after thy sister in law.” “And Ruth said, Entreat me not to leave thee, or to return from following after thee: for whither thou goest, I will go; and where thou lodgest, I will lodge: thy people shall be my people, and thy God my God.”

The scriptures read that Naomi saw that Ruth was “steadfastly minded” to go with her, so she stopped trying to change Ruth’s mind, and they traveled together. When they met, Naomi was the stranger living in a strange land. Now that they moved back to Naomi’s homeland, Ruth was the stranger living in a strange land. Ruth accepted this challenge and worked hard in the fields of a relative of Naomi’s. She brought back what she earned to her mother-in-law and shared it with her. Ruth was also obedient to Naomi; she followed her counsel and directions. Naomi introduced Ruth to new people. Later when Ruth had a baby, Naomi took care of the baby. 

There is much in this story for us to relate to. Many of us in this congregation are strangers in a strange land. Ruth and Naomi, in their own turns, both experienced that feeling. Ruth is a wonderful example of being loyal and of working hard despite difficulties. Naomi is a good example of welcoming someone, introducing her to people, helping her find work, and even though she is too old to work in the fields, she worked in the home and tended to the baby. These acts of ministering to each other are acts we can all do. We can serve one another. We can work hard even in a new place. We can make new friends, and we can see the needs around us and help fill them. 

I have witnessed many women in this ward and in this Church doing just that. Small acts can mean more than we realize. Women make meals for or send meals to others. Women take care of another’s children. I have heard of rides given, texts sent, listening ears, and open arms available for acceptance and love. I reached out to people I know and asked them to share experiences of the Christlike influence they have felt in their lives due to women. I will paraphrase some of what they said.

“One time when my husband was traveling and I was sick, a friend from the ward asked if she could bring me some chicken soup that she’d made for dinner. It was exactly what my daughters had been asking me to make for weeks. It was so perfect and perfectly timed. I don’t think she even knew I wasn’t feeling well. I felt incredibly loved.”

“My ward held a Super Saturday and I was invited to teach at it. I presented on Book of Mormon art. Some senior missionary sisters were in my session, and they made comments that I’ve come back to over the years for strength. I’m grateful to the sisters for those comments and for the RS presidency for organizing the activity, without which I wouldn’t have been able to hear those comments nor had the the opportunity to prepare for it and teach at it!”

“I am a special needs mom, and I cannot participate the way others do. It is hard. At one time, I hadn’t been to church in over a month, and I had to ask to stop serving in my calling. Two sisters from the ward remembered my birthday, and one even showed up at my home with cake and a present. People like me are often unseen. These sisters saw me even when I wasn’t at church.”

“I feel served and loved by sisters in my ward all the time. One specific example comes to mind. Last year, my son went to boarding school, and it was the right thing for him and our family, but it was not easy for my heart. On the day that I flew back to Mexico after dropping him off for the first time, I came home to find flowers and a thoughtful card left by a sister in our ward. She knew it would be a hard day for me, and she took the time to make me feel loved and supported.”

“When I was in the hospital, a sister in our ward insisted on bringing us a delicious dinner. Also another sister had dropped off several very thoughtful gifts to me over the last year. A calendar with really thought provoking scripture prompts that went along with our scripture study for the year. I am grateful for those acts of kindness.”

“A sister in our ward always messages me whenever there is an activity and asks me if I would like a ride. It makes me feel loved.”

“I’m not able to attend our ward regularly, but a sister in our ward always remembers me and sends me messages when there are activities coming up.”

“My parents had been wanting to go on a trip for a while to visit their son and meet their grandson for the first time, but they were intimidated to travel to the other side of the globe on their own and wanted me to go with them. It was daunting to figure out how I could leave my children for that long to help my parents. I reached out to women in this ward to help me in various ways to fill the holes I was leaving, and they stepped up. One came to my house every morning for two weeks. I just asked her to make sure my kids were awake and getting ready, but she also fed them and got the morning started in a positive way for them. Getting to school is not easy for all of my kids, nor is being cheerful in the morning, so I’m incredibly grateful to this sister, and I feel very loved.”

“The Sunday after my dad died, which was three days after he passed, I was sitting in church and a little girl came up to me with a bouquet of flowers with notes from all the kids in her family saying they were sorry about my dad’s passing. Also that same week, another sister gave me a loaf of zucchini bread. Also a sister listened as I talked to her about my dad. Those things may be small to them, but they meant the world to me.”

“There have been three times I can think of when I was ill and friends came by and helped take care of my kids and clean my house. One time, I was just low key exhausted from everything, and a friend stopped by completely unannounced with fast food for all of my kids and her kids. We had a picnic in the backyard, and it was the most magical, peaceful afternoon. It completely reset my whole mindset and made me feel like ok yeah, I can do this. I hadn’t even told her that I was feeling overwhelmed and exhausted and at the edge of my sanity. She just showed up. The other two times when friends came to help, they knew I was struggling even though I didn’t ask for help. They just knew I was having a hard time and came.”

“I’m too scared to drive to the temple, but I really like to go. A friend in our ward drives me every single time.”

“The sisters in our ward listen to me. They don’t judge me. They compliment me. My life has those who take me for granted, who aren’t grateful, who criticize. But at this church with these sisters, I feel worthwhile, cherished, and valued. These sisters might have no idea how down I feel about myself sometimes, but I am so grateful for how they always lift me up.”

“About ten years ago when my kids were still little. I was pregnant with my third and in so much pain from my hernias that I couldn’t take care of myself much less my baby and my toddler. I had a couple friends who organized themselves to take shifts to come play with my kids, tidy my house, feed my kids etc. They even had their own kids who they brought with them, but they still came and took care of me. I got to rest. I felt kind of guilty about it but also so so so incredibly grateful and loved.”

“I have felt Christlike love from the sisters in this ward. Sisters giving me a ride to the temple; my ministering sister checking up on me and praying for me and my family; another sister being aware of a difficult time and sending some freezer meals.“

“Even on the first day I arrived in our ward, a sister greeted me like we were old friends, and she always had a smile for me. Actually many sisters welcomed me with warm smiles.”

“My children are grown and live far away, but I love children. A sister in the ward always lets me play with hers, and I feel loved.”

“One time when I was drowning in toddlers and babies, and my husband was out of town, I was feeding my kids lunch when I realized we were out of ketchup. My kids started crying, because we didn’t have any. I was so overwhelmed. I heard a knock at the door, and a sister from the ward my same age was there with a bottle of ketchup. I was so confused, and she said she was at the store and got a strong feeling that she needed to bring me ketchup. This was not a woman that I was close with. I just felt God’s love so strong and felt so seen.”

“Death is something people don’t want to talk about or think about. It’s painful and awkward. And yet the women in my life who have covenanted to mourn with those who mourn have extended love and service to me in so many ways. They have never lost a child, but they instinctively know how to help carry my burden. Women of the Lomas Ward have never met my daughter, but they bring me flowers on her birthday and shower me with words of love. They are working the errands of angels.”

“One time, a sister sat in her car with me and listened to me cry for over an hour. She gave me some amazing advice and a lot of acceptance and love.”

“I have been at the receiving end of so much Christlike kindness, support, and love in this ward. From rides to the temple (and various other places!), helping me with my kids during sacrament, holding my child so I can teach at church, meals when I’ve been sick, a friendly smile or kind comment, and so much more. It can be hard for me to accept service at times, but when I was in my first trimester there was a week I felt like I was hitting rock bottom from exhaustion and nausea. A sister offered to bring me dinner and instead of my usual answer of “oh I’m fine, but thank you!”, I was desperate and said “Yes please!” Her incredible soup was the first thing I’d been able to happily eat in days without getting more nauseated and I just felt so loved that she would drop everything to feed me. She could sense that I needed a friend and a pick me up! Several other sisters had my girls over for play dates too so I could just rest for a few hours and that was also so wonderful. Often something that might seem simple to us is actually a really big deal to the person on the receiving end, especially when done with Christlike love. And when it’s me on the receiving end, it serves as such a good reminder of how crucial even small acts of service are in the lives of others.”

“There are so many examples of sisters showing me Christlike love in this ward! Women who continually reach out and show me love. A sister who showed up to help me move. Another who brought me soup when I was sick. One sister who chats with me at gymnastics when I need a friend. And a sister who saved me when I urgently needed soccer shoes for my son. And another family who invites us over to eat. One time, I really needed to get out of the city and relax, but my husband was out of town and driving that far was daunting, but an amazing sister in our ward drove my car with me and my four kids for four hours. It was such a kindness and exactly what I needed.”

“A sister went out of her way to write me a really nice card for my birthday, and recently when I was sick a sister in our ward brought me two meals. Another sister shows me interest and expresses love all the time.”

“I have felt Christlike love from many different women. A sister always invites me to things and reaches out. That has made it so much easier to make friends and build a community. Another sister also helped out last minute with activity days and she was super helpful and willing. It really made the night.

“This may sound silly, but a year or two ago, I was at my kids’ school, and my phone stopped working. I had counted on using it to order an uber, but it was broken. It would have taken me a long time to walk home, and I was carrying a lot of heavy books. I had phone numbers written down on a piece of paper in my bag. My husband’s phone number and the phone numbers of my ministering sisters. I asked the school secretary if I could use her phone. She let me. I worried my ministering sister wouldn’t answer the call because it would be coming from an unknown number, but she did, and she even came to pick me up and bring me home even though it made her a little late to her next appointment. I felt so very loved and taken care of.”

“A sister coming to my apartment and helped me carry some stuff to my car when I was moving and my husband was not in the country. She also listened to me on a bench in a park in when I needed to talk. Thank you for asking me this question, it reminds me how the Lord has been mindful to me through Christlike sisters. I am very grateful.”

These women from our ward and wards all over the world listen to the Spirit. They take the time to lift up those around them. We are all busy. We are all haggard. We are all tired. In a world where more and more often, people check out of humanity in a cycle of scrolling and self satisfaction, these women are fulfilling the role of Christ in the lives of those around them. Their love is felt. Their sacrifice is noticed. And they also receive this support and kindness from the sisters around them when they are the ones who need it. They are disciples of Christ, following His example.

Jesus had a relative named John the Baptist who played an important role in his ministry. Devastatingly, John the Baptist was beheaded by Herod. I will now quote from a talk by President Camille N. Johnson, the current Relief Society General President: “Upon learning of His cousin’s death, Jesus tried to retreat by ship into a ‘desert place apart,’ perhaps to mourn, but crowds of people followed Him on foot. In a show of great compassion, Christ spent the day with the people and even performed one of His mighty miracles, feeding the crowd of thousands with five loaves and two fishes. That night, the Savior performed a second great miracle. He had gone into the mountain, ‘apart’ from His disciples, to pray. His disciples boarded a ship, which was then encompassed in the Sea of Galilee, tossed with waves and wind. ‘And … Jesus went unto them, walking on the sea,’ prompting the disciples to say, ‘Of a truth thou art the Son of God.’ Jesus next traveled northward from Galilee to the coasts of Tyre and Sidon, which are in modern-day Lebanon. He was surely seeking ‘rest, seclusion, or adequate opportunity of instructing the Twelve,’ which had eluded Him. It was there that ‘a woman of Canaan came out of the same coasts, and cried unto him, saying, Have mercy on me, O Lord, thou Son of David; my daughter is grievously vexed with a devil. . . . Jesus Christ responded with an empowering and familiar answer: ‘O woman, great is thy faith: be it unto thee even as thou wilt.’ This demonstration that He values and embraces each of us in our journey to come unto Him is followed in the scriptural record by the assurance that ‘her daughter was made whole from that very hour.’”

Jesus healed the daughter of the woman of Canaan. Even when time was precious. Even when He was trying to find solitude. Even when He knew His primary role during His mortal ministry was to teach the gospel to the Jews. He took the time to show love.

Women of this Church also take the time to show love.

President Russell M. Nelson said: “Attacks against the Church, its doctrine, and our way of life are going to increase. Because of this, we need women who have a bedrock understanding of the doctrine of Christ and who will use that understanding to teach and help raise a sin-resistant generation. We need women who can detect deception in all of its forms. We need women who know how to access the power that God makes available to covenant keepers and who express their beliefs with confidence and charity. We need women who have the courage and vision of our Mother Eve.”

The second general Relief Society president, Eliza R. Snow, said: “We want to be ladies in very deed, not according to the term of the word as the world judges, but fit companions of the Gods and Holy Ones. In an organized capacity we can assist each other in not only doing good but in refining ourselves, and whether few or many come forward and help to prosecute this great work, they will be those that will fill honorable positions in the Kingdom of God. . . . Women should be women and not babies that need petting and correction all the time. I know we like to be appreciated but if we do not get all the appreciation which we think is our due, what matters? We know the Lord has laid high responsibility upon us, and there is not a wish or desire that the Lord has implanted in our hearts in righteousness but will be realized, and the greatest good we can do to ourselves and each other is to refine and cultivate ourselves in everything that is good and ennobling to qualify us for those responsibilities.”

President Gordon B. Hinckley said: “I am convinced there is no other organization anywhere to match the Relief Society of this Church. It has a membership of more than five million women across the earth. If they will be united and speak with one voice, their strength will be incalculable. . . . It is so tremendously important that the women of the Church stand strong and immovable for that which is correct and proper under the plan of the Lord.”

President Spencer W. Kimball said: “Much of the major growth that is coming to the Church in the last days will come because many of the good women of the world . . . will be drawn to the Church in large numbers. This will happen to the degree that the women of the Church reflect righteousness and articulateness in their lives and to the degree that the women of the Church are seen as distinct and different—in happy ways—from the women of the world. . . . Among the real heroines in the world who will come into the Church are women who are more concerned with being righteous than with being selfish. These real heroines have true humility, which places a higher value on integrity than on visibility. . . . Thus it will be that female exemplars of the Church will be a significant force in both the numerical and the spiritual growth of the Church in the last days.”

President Brigham Young said: “The sisters in our Female Relief Societies have done great good. Can you tell the amount of good that the mothers and daughters in Israel are capable of doing? No, it is impossible. And the good they will do will follow them to all eternity.”

I agree. It would be impossible to share all of the stories of love and compassion done by the women of this ward and of our Church. So many of them are hidden, known only to the doer and the receiver. Indeed, some are only known to the receiver, because we, the doers, often have no concept of what our hello in the hallway, our conversation in the chapel, our filling of the empty seat in a pew means to the receiver. It means a lot, and it makes a difference. 

I am grateful to the women in this ward who have been my sisters in the truest sense of the word. I am very grateful to our Savior Jesus Christ who is our examplar. He showed us the path to follow, and it is full of kindness, forgiveness, meekness, strength, patience, compassion, love, and service. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.