Monday, January 11, 2010

Cold is a relative thing.

I have always thought that cold was relative. For example, in the fall when it gets down to 60, I start wearing a jacket or a sweater. In the spring/end of winter, when it gets up to 60, I wear short sleeves. It's all about comparison.

My parents live in Detroit, so they get lots of lovely snow, and my dad just sent me this chain e-mail that shows that cold is not only about comparison, but about what you're used to. I hope it gives you some chuckles like it did me.

65 above zero
Floridians turn on the heat.
People in Michigan plant gardens.

60 above zero
Californians shiver uncontrollably.
People in Michigan sunbathe.

50 above zero
Italian & English cars won't start.
People in Michigan drive with the windows down..

40 above zero
Georgians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves, wool hats.
People in Michigan throw on a flannel shirt.

35 above zero
New York landlords finally turn up the heat.
People in Michigan have the last cookout before it gets cold.

20 above zero
People in Miami all die.
Michiganders close the windows.

Zero
Californians fly away to Mexico.
People in Michigan get out their winter coats.

10 below zero
Hollywood disintegrates.
The Girl Scouts in Michigan are selling cookies door to door.

20 below zero
Washington DC runs out of hot air.
People in Michigan let the dogs sleep indoors.

30 below zero
Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
Michiganders get upset because they can't start the snowmobile.

40 below zero
ALL atomic motion stops.
People in Michigan start saying, "Cold enough fer ya?"

50 below zero
Hell freezes over.
Lions win the Super Bowl.

7 comments:

  1. I love that email! I remember getting it when I was in middle school-ish, only it was about Boston/Massachusetts, of course. And the 50 below one was "Hell freezes over. Red Sox win the World Series." I guess, though, that Hell has since frozen over since the Red Sox have indeed won the World Series.

    I love funny, sarcastic people.

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  2. lol that's so funny!
    i love things that make me laugh in the middle of the day :)
    thank you for your sweet email. i don't really need anything... i'm sure i will be fine ;)
    you're the best!

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  3. Devin and I had a pretty good chuckle with that one too.

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  4. Haha - I can't speak for the rest of the country, but it's definitely true about the Californians. When we first moved here (last January) we had a pool in our apartment complex. I didn't understand why no one was using it as it was so sunny and nice out. So Brooklyn and I decided to take a dip. Truth be told the water was actually a bit cold, but that didn't stop us from going back again. 60 is really about as cold as it ever gets during the days where I live. And yes, people do say, "It's so cold!"

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  5. Your Uncle Geoff replied to this note indicating that he was hoping to get to the grill one more time before the temperature really drops.

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  6. This is so true! Here in Texas, when it dropped down into the 20s there were warnings on the news not to go outside, "because it was dangerously cold"! Back home in North Dakota a few weeks ago, 25 and sunny meant I could run to the store with just a sweatshirt instead of a bulky winter jacket.

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  7. now i have to find one about heat for the Phoenicians...

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