Tuesday, October 26, 2004

interesting facts

so i really am learning so much in my classes... i love it.
here are some interesting facts i learned in my human development class. it's so cool right now because my human development class and my general psychology class are both talking about adolescence so i get to hear it from two different teachers, with their different viewpoints, and of course the two different textbooks are interesting too.
anyway here they are

this was a study done by robin gilmour in 1988. some of these answers might seem weird to you like "i look for a man that has good abstract reasoning" but they're accumulative. she added what different people said and put them in the top ten categories, like she would put "hott" "cute" "pretty" "sexy" "beautiful" into "physically attractive" catch my drift? okay before you read these quickly think about what five or ten characteristics you want in your future partner, or current partner for some, or what you think your partner would like in you...

okay women on average look for these desirable qualities in their men:
1. a record of achievement
2. leadership qualities
3. skills at his job
4. earning potential
5. sense of humor
6. intellectual ability
7. attentiveness
8. common sense
9. athletic ability
10. good abstract reasoning

so we're thinking hmm women can be kind of shallow... then we see what the research brought up for the average man looking for desirable qualities in a woman:
1. physical attractiveness
2. ability in bed
3. warmth and affection
4. social skill
5. homemaking ability
6. dress sense
7. sensitivity to others' needs
8. good taste
9. moral perception
10. artistic creativity

i think it's funny that the guys threw "moral perception" there at the end.
so yeah these are just interesting facts to think about

a research done in 1979 by hill, rubin, and peplau discovered three more interesting facts:

*women are more likely to end the relationship
*rejected men tend to be lonelier, unhappier, and more depressed than rejected women
*rejected men find it harder than rejected women to accept the end of the relationship and manage to stay friends

and the third interesting fact of the day...
we were learning about rites of passage in traditional cultures, like boys becoming men and girls becoming women
well...
in kenya, some tribes have boys become men in an interesting way
boys aren't circumsized until they are sixteen years old and are given nothing to dull the pain
they are men if they bear it without making noise or indicating any pain or discomfort
it is then known about town how the boy (now man) was able to handle it...

yeah and i thought our dating rituals were painful.
that rite of passage definitely takes the cake
sorry boys...

so yeah think about these. wonder why rejected men get more depressed and women end relationships more... i mean would you have guessed that?
did the average qualities match up with yours?
it's just food for thought...

1 comment:

  1. Dumped men get more depressed, because they realize that it was a mistake to be in a relationship with someone who was going to get over them quicker than they're gonna be over her. Someone who under a slightly different set of circumstances and behavior/body language would not have even gone out with them. Someone to whom "I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you" is just something to say when you are in the moment, and not something to make sure you mean years later. I guess that MIGHT be why "moral sense" is one of the qualities men look for, because they realize "I love you" have a completely different meaning to a woman than it does for them.

    Why should I, as a man, fall in love with someone who's just going to change her mind about me when she finds something she doesn't like about me? You want an example of this kind of thinking? A lot of males with a higher end IQ share it. Here's a link to a break-up scene from Good Will Hunting that shows a typical reason for a guy to end a relationship, as a pre-emptive measure to the girl ending it. Because she WILL end it, it's just what women do. Statistics show they end relationships 3-4 times more. Which is a tremendous 80% to 20% difference.

    The Break-up Scene: http://youtube.com/watch?v=Rq0apHW6Ezw

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